A Mockery of The Institution

December 31, 2007

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Gosh – If I don’t scream, and I just did – I think I would have trashed everything in the house.

I am so tired of living here. Many of the would-be {wannabee} savants say that as long as the heart is not happy, it will never be happy anywhere else in the world. I know I’ll be happy elsewhere even if I have to acknowledge being ‘humus’ beneath your feet as you proudly stomp about walking like an ignoble arrogant!. I have tried my very best to love this country, the people, embracing the quotidian madness, but I can’t. At the slightest of agitation, I am capable of lashing out a storm, a tsunami, and even initiate complete world destruction* {yup, I’ve tried that before}, and no weapons of mass destruction can ever match the Powers that be – When I was ascertained of this capability as a child, everything that annoyed me gets completely annihilated – as in the case of the recent tsunami, the earthquakes in Pakistan and Yemen… amongst others.

What do you think Global warming is all about?

Santa Claus getting merrier that all the good souls proclaiming themselves to be just and propagating goodness with their lips, and kill their brothers, and sisters with their hearts? I try… to be calm. But the more I come in contact with these insipid creatures not worth being a mere dust under my Throne {you can call the W.C just that if you’d like!}, annoying me for reasons I can never comprehend I just feel like zapping them into oblivion, and you think “Heroes” is just a sitcom.

I’m not in the capacity of withholding balance – I used to be superlicious super wohman but now, every single thing that edges out of balance perturbs me – I’m turning into a Myself {for you become whom you think most of!}, or at least Medusa with Tesla coils neutralizing polarities so that you may live, at least have the courtesy to experience “Life”!. I’m so freaking paranoid when things do not go the way it should {and when I say that, it usually means when things do NOT improve, when it should in a ‘developed’ country like Malaysia, still veiling a tenth world mentality}.

My biological father used to say, that things do not necessarily have to be the way they are – that really upset me. … take for example Maxis’ most prized hype about their 3.5G Broadband service – the download speed is at best if you’re lucky 314kbps testing from San Francisco. Upload speed to New York is about 138kbps, and download bandwidth is gauge at 90kbps. And they rave and rant about how super their services are as compared to any other ISP in town. At the rate they hype about Broadband TV and the likes, they might as well close shop, or shoot themselves in the mouth!

Companies propagating false advertising should be sued, left right and center!

How could not things be better? Why do I have to settle for mediocrity? Why do people have to be subjected to imperfections? There is not a nanobyte of imperfection in this whole Universe, but yet ‘humans’ clamor this giving excuses to allow themselves to be imperfect? Can one not perceive how perfect a being the ‘human’ entity is? Can another actually create a form so perfect, in detailed with all the wondrous workings of senses – whomever sings that tune again in my face, I’m so going to blast them to the abyss!

Of course some dick head will come up with a brilliant song and hum it along … “I’m only Human.. born to make mistaaakes..”. If one is born to make mistakes, then one might as well be an amoeba, or some other nondescript entity – for crying out loud, a human is supposedly to be intelligent – it is endowed with a brain, that is supposedly to be able to hold the Kingdom of the Lord, herein planet euphoria {Earth} – but no, instead they kill themselves, they make a mockery of the whole institution of Life.

* I already have