Trying To Save Paper
That was definitely the ‘show’ of the year, and NOT a stupid answer – This morning I had a call from the Ministry. They had asked why the paper that I had sent them almost four months ago were so finely printed and not completed in their judgement.
If I had to print for God, it would have sufficed for He would have gotten the strongest magnifying glass and read it without problem or He would have at least vet through the CD I had enclosed with three formats of the Financial Summary – .pdf; .doc; .ods. My simple answer to such a quandary was … “I was trying to save Paper” which indeed I was – let’s see… we’re promulgating a Green economy, and we’re still printing on paper ?
I could have laughed at the question really, but I was at tether edge – not having enough funds to complete the printing of my ingenious idea of putting Malaysia back on the World map. I only had RM11 to my name, my savings spent on everything else I can imagine – from paying my rent, utilities, and canned food since I am a workaholic 20/24. And yes, I do sleep only four hours daily – not necessarily at night.
Four months ago, I attempted to send my application to a certain Government Ministry because that was, at the time my only “hope” left despite the fact that I knew they’d at least take three months to revert. I had setup a company then to only to have the ex-director failing out on me due to my being ‘rude’ apparently to her. When you’re stressed, it is only natural to bark especially when you’re dished tasks from ‘N’ to ‘Z’ where the ‘appointee’ was supposedly to have undertaken, whilst I had to undertake ‘A’ to ‘M’. Women may be the greatest catalyst in getting things done or chattering like hens in a barn and making the barn the sweetest and cleanest in the farm, but put two or more in a box, and you’ll have the whole house ruined because each will want to have their egoes noted and seen above everything else. Never ever have more than two women in the same room as you, or you’ll definitely not get any work done. Have two or more men in a cubicle with you, and you’ll have pleasures to tease all year round.
Trust me, I’m a BITCH {Babe, In Total Control of Herself!} – I may be the most dysfunctional one since I don’t indulge in men, and get them to do my biddings, but at least I know I’m not making use of people to get the things I want in life!!
Back to this story … I was literally broke – Having being unfairly dismissed by the previous NGO {Cordoba Initiative – the Head decided to grant my Department to an American party {outside Malaysia}, despite the fact that we were based in Malaysia and having had completed the online portal .. long story cut short}; and with the passing-on of my dearest father the same year, I had nothing left. The only savings I had then was kept for paying rent, and Internet access. I believe in the One, and Only – HU had put me there, and HU will get me out of the situation – The Lord NEVER puts one in a situation that He Knows well we cannot handle {but enough talking of spiritualogies and Hadith rigmaroles and pointing fingers!}. I also believe in good honest work – and work to a perfectionist is ensuring everything is there in its right place. I was taught to never give people a minute chance to complaint about the work you’ve undertaken, and I’ve stuck to that through thick and thin. It’s my signature, and if there’s a typo on this blog – hell, greater men have made errors yet I don’t see you complainin’ do I dahling?
The ex-partner in question left the company before I could submit the application as a Company. Instead ‘friends’ whom I then knew were of course, just ‘friends’ that I can do without now because I knew if they had been true to the Lord, they would have helped. People say a lot of things but in reality, the Lord Knows who is faithful, and who isn’t. So quit with the acting of being fervent church goers and proclaiming the Lord as Saviour. If you dish someone asking for help, do you sincerely think the Lord will help you when you’re about to cross the threshold of Life ? I submitted the application as an individual knowing very well, that even if they had taken a glimpse of my concept paper, they would sit down and think hard about it.
They did – but now I’d have to re-submit those because they simply cannot read the financial summary. I told the lady, that they could vet through the CD, but no can do – they want to see it in print. Which means, I’d have to go out in a couple of hours, and print the paper in 12 points and stitch it up with UHU. Send it back to them so that I would be invited for the ‘presentation’. I’d also have to slightly change the concept to research and work done for the region instead of the world – hey what do you expect with RM90k? The world? I’d also have to scour for sponsors and get them in the book before implementing the project – and with only 13 days in the backburner, you can’t expect miracles now can you ? especially now after the most recent ‘institutional’ crisis that rocked the world.
I used to say, that nothing is impossible – but now, I’d add … is it really worth the time and energy spent to make them see the importance of putting Malaysia back on the world map? If you don’t support me, how can I possibly help you acheive your positioning ? If you’re stingy with me for this project, how can I make it work? If you can spend millions on infrastructure that is constantly faulty and more often than not, get it to work, and rather spend pittance on me, please don’t expect miracles!
I was only trying to save paper, and promulgate a Green economy!
post scriptum: Oh WordPress! Thank you for 2.8.1 ++
